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Thursday, November 24, 2011

Gratitude and Grief

No, I am not grieving today, but I can’t stop thinking about those who are. I'm thinking of those who have recently lost family members and friends, who are out of work, whose lives have been disrupted by life-threatening and/or painful illness or injury, etc. I don’t usually think of such things on Thanksgiving Day but was reminded by a visit to the bookstore by someone who has lived through multiple traumatic events this past year how difficult holidays are for those in pain.

Gratitude and grief—does either one occupy so much space that there is no room left for the other? How easy it is for me or anyone else whose life is full and happy to remind others to be thankful, but I wonder--if my life had been torn apart, would the reminders to be grateful help me, or would they be yet another blow, meaningless noise from an uncaring world? I don’t know. It probably depends on the person hearing the message and how it’s delivered and any number of other seemingly inconsequential circumstances.

To everyone celebrating and giving thanks today I send warm greetings, To those in grief and pain I can’t think of anything to say, but I send you hugs. What can that possibly mean? Hugs can’t feel very warm coming through a blog rather than in person, can they? I just want you to know you are not forgotten, and the whole world is not uncaring, though it sometimes feels that way. Sometimes when people are happy they don’t know what to say to others in pain, but we can still listen, so call someone if you need to! Reach out if you can! We do care, however wordlessly and helplessly. And if you don’t have the energy to deal with anyone face to face today, this link may help a little bit.

I know. This seems like a strange post for Thanksgiving. But it felt important to me, too, so here it is.


Anonymous said...

Gratitude and grief. Yes. Holding the two together, and honoring them both. Honoring you, today, too, Pamela, and Margo on the river.

P. J. Grath said...

I'm so happy to think of you reading about Margo on the river! Thanks for taking time to stop in today, Kathy.

Kathy said...

Pamela, I just wrote this to you on my site:

You are right, Pamela. There are many more dimensions than two sides. Perhaps I meant to say “Pay attention and be grateful” but, in reality, I’ve said that six dozen times in the past three blogging years. I wanted to say something that would bring attention to the polar opposite, and therefore, perhaps, illuminate the ordinary side. The side we usually view.

OK, back to Margo. I want to be her. LOL! OK, maybe not quite her, but a shade of her.

P. J. Grath said...

Kathy, you are right, too! It IS important to pay attention and be thankful for small, ordinary, everyday moments and hours! We do not disagree at all. We were looking at different problems, that's all.

I don't want to BE Margo, but I'm thankful for all the wonderful days I spent on the Paw Paw River and Little Rabbit River and Crystal River and Victoria Creek and Sucker River and...and...and...!

Dawn said...

THanks for sharing the link. And for thinking of others out there who just might need that hug. And YES cyber hugs DO help. I know they do because I have received many and they always make me feel better. Hugs back at you.

P. J. Grath said...

Dawn, your comment means a lot to me, because I know you've been there. xxxooo!!!